From Practicing Peace in Times of War, by Pema Chodron
"Some people find the teachings I offer helpful because I encourage them to be kind to themselves--but this does not mean pampering our neurosis. The kindness that I learned from my teachers and that I wish so much to convey to other people, is kindness toward all qualities of our being. The qualities that are the toughest to be kind to are the painful parts, where we feel ashamed, as if we don't belong, as if we've just blown it, when things are falling apart for us. Maitri means sticking with ourselves when we don't have anything, when we feel like a loser. And it becomes the basis for extending the same unconditional friendliness to others."